Turning left from a two-lane road, I'll move intopposing lane.

That Expedition don't seem very "green". I like to tell people I removed the catalytic converter from my pickup truck to make it pollute more. Didn't really do that, but it's fun to see the reaction I get from some tree huggers. It's usually the ones with the Subaru Foresters with the bike racks and some kind of bumper sticker indicating they're a communist, or environmentalist, or both. Those are the types I like to mess with.

My dad is fascinated by wind and solar energy. Likes to tow his bicycle around with kites and sails and always drives tiny little underpowered cars and when he's on a road trip he'll tailgate trucks to break the wind, to save on gas. Or he'll just putt along at 50 mph on the interstate. Drives me nuts. I harass him all the time. He'll come over when I'm home, and idle along really slow on his motorcycle to be "green", and I'll be sitting there burning a month's worth of tree branches that fell in the yard (27 trees on the property) and as soon as he starts talking about being "green" and "carbon emissions" and stuff I'll pour some used motor oil on the fire and say "I just killed a polar bear". He just kind of rolls his eyes and walks away.

 

LMFAO!!!!!!!!


Personally I like to eat my polar bear wrapped in penguin from an endangered armadillo shell with my elephant ivory spoon while wearing fur from the rarest mink and shooting whales for sport from my baby seal killing yacht