embarassing question

Come to the dark side . . . I have spare flip flops . . .

 

Wait...wait wait wait...why are we anti Volvo?! I mean ya it’s spelled similar to a female body part, ambit at school it was the only truck that didn’t feel like the transmission was going to fall out with every shift!

 

My last steel volvo was in '89 a beautiful truck big kitty and all that then. No trouble at all.

The first of company plastic volvos issued to me in 92' with the half pinched airbags and engines that wont get out of their way no matter how high you wind em or how low you shift them is the first inkling of a truly crappy future with them. When you do get a hold of a volvo today and try to drive it, you have to look everywhere to know if its sliding or not. Like a car... they say. All other trucks "Talk" through the steering wheel. You know instantly if shes sliding when that wheel gets loose and adjust for it.

I drove my last volvo in the auction house when I sit in it for 2 hours burning out the starter overriding the every 40 second shut down of the engine due to fatal flaws. No one bought it. It went to salvage. It's easy to understand not to buy it when someone is cranking every 40 seconds to hear that sick thing die 20 seconds later for 2 hours next to a crowd of dealers.

Real smart that seller. He got nothing but tears and junk. It only had 480000 miles on it.

 

Better get some super dark window tint so no one can see you driving a Volvo.

 

Welp, there went my last bite of Cookie Dough Ice Cream....glad it hit my lap and not the keyboard~!

 

i enjoyed the volvos i drove. 96 and 03. totally different trucks. that 96 had a detroit? i think. rode like ####, but it was mean. it would outpull everything else in the yard. the 03 was much nicer and honestly still pulled pretty well. i want to say 465 hp maybe? been a few years, hard to recall. neither of which required much maintenance in the 11 years i was around that place. although the 96 enjoyed killing air bags for some reason. both of them would pull circles around the 93 kenworth and 98 mack they had.

 

Speaking from experience, I can tell you a couple ways to avoid being teased about driving a Volvo.

Draw attention away from the truck.
You can do this by dressing up like a cowboy, silver toed cow boots with spurs, cowhide vest, double breasted push button shirt, chaps, string tie with a longhorn slider, pie plate belt buckle and a 45.4 litre hat.
(37.85 litres in the US)
They won't even notice the truck, they might talk about you behind your back, but the fact that you drive a Volvo won't even enter their mind.

The second method is my favourite.
Wear a hockey mask and place a chainsaw and an axe on the dashboard where folks can see it.
They may notice you're driving a Volvo, but they probably won't say anything.