Trucking can be like a bad marriage...

Hi,

In all honesty, you left out a few, that are far more reputable...

But again...I don't feel like sharing opportunity with strangers...

Opportunity is reserved for those who are real, clear of bias, and who have stuck by...

If people want to be 'hee-haw' and hold onto their biases...than fine...

But for those who care about paying bills and opportunity...maybe I'll share stuff with them in the future...

Purchased new phone...this one has camera on it...

Anyways...back soon...

 

Shine baby shine...

This is still a trucking thread...
And I can still appreciate drivers who go out of their way to keep their rides sparkling and clean...like this fella here...had to take photo...photo does it injustice...

Not even so much as brake dust on these drive rims...

 

Hi, the pace of my life, or scheduale has been picking up lately...

Soon though, I'll have the internet again..and will be able to keep you updated real time...but right now I can't...

Life moves forward though...

There's so much I know...that could help others...but I don't really feel like helping stand offish people or souls...

At this point in my life...I just don't need too...

Small minds will accomplish small things...

Your limited by your own mind and limitations...
And your limited by your own imagined biases...which mean nothing to me at this stage...

Stupid people don't feed me...never have...

My success is not built on the backs of stupid people...

Any how...just dropped in to say hello to those who are real...

JimDriv3...I consider you one of the real ones...

Later...

 

I think this is what people want to hear...

Republicans gooood....Democrats baaaaad....duh...

Obama baaaaaad....Large Corpations and CEO's...goooood....

Radiation goooood......liberals baaaad......

Obamas a Marxist......Rush Limbaugh gooood....

And if all I did was repeat that over and over again..I to could have a succesful talk radio show....

http://www.aaskolnick.com/######/aeneuman.gif

 

There's like this geeky librarian lady I'm falling far...

It doesn't make sense for me to say that on this forum, since you all know so little about me...

But she reminds me of a high school sweetheart I had...and so far she's receptive...

We'll see...

 

Consumer Warning!!

Do not get one of these...


Pre-paid Virgin Moble modem....

What they don't tell you until after you get it is...after 2.5 GB, they reserve the right to diminish your stream speed...basically turning it into dial up type slow motion speed...

Also...depending on where you live, you may or may not get a decent signal...

Also...they are moving away from 3G service...and going to 4G service...which is weaker and much slower.

These are things the sales people at Radio Shack do not tell you.

Infact...I think I'll start a Consumer guide thread on here...where people can comment on products they purchase.

There's no worse feeling than being swindled out of your hard earned money do to a sales person not doing their job and filling you in on the details...

It's worse for drivers who often are hundreds of miles away by the time they discover their product doesn't work or is not what they requested...

Virgin moble broadband only works for you if you happen to live in an area of good signal strength...if not, your stuck with dial up speed...

(if they want people to buy their product...than simply improove the product...it's that simple)

 

I've been off the internet for a while...well a few days...going to the library gets old after a while...and I've been busy with other things...like work...(a job)...or (jobs)....

(oh boy, I can hear the jokes now)....you know what I mean...a regular 'job'...like employment...

Yes, I'm working again...I sorta have two jobs, but only one I can depend on...one that wants to hire me perminatly soon...but believe it or not...a part of me is still hesitant to commit at this moment...

Jobs aren't to be taken lightly anymore...not in this day and age...

And even though you may not take the job seriously, they do...

Again...getting hired is like entering a 'marriage'...



You sign a contract, and then are whisked off to your honeymoon with your new employer...
Sometimes it works out, sometimes it doesn't...

But it is a marriage, an agreement. Once married, your obligated...

And sometimes the 'romance' where's out fast...just depends...
And the divorce can be ugly...your mate (employer) can really scrw you over and destroy your ability to re-marry.

That's why it's good to date, or study potential employers, before you tie the knot...cause once you do....

I'm not even sure if this is an area I want to settle in...

In the past, I'd think nothing of getting hired, and then quiting 3-4 months down the road if I felt like it...but now...that's not so wise...

Anyhow...the courting will continue for a few more weeks, unil and or if I decide to do something different.

I'm sorta back on the net now too...but not sure how long that will last...I've gotten use to getting by without it...

Kinda forces you to get involved in real things...

Anyhow...just a quick update...more to follow as usual...here and elsewhere...

 

What I had for dinner...

1 can of 'Lady Liberty' Asparagus...



And

a partial can of 'Wylwood' whole potatoes...



Right out the can and raw...

It's something I learned to do when I was homeless...I realized always heating food up was nothing more than a convience...

Often times food taste just as good at room tempurature...



I have to learn how to write on here again...
My forum name...'Ghostchild'...

Has so many metaphorical implications...for one, like a 'ghost'...I seem to linger on...haunt...dwell...this place here...

For although others may come and go...I linger and hang around...

Typical of a 'ghost' or 'spirit'...



It's as if something keeps me here, even though maybe my time has past...as if not wanting to move on...again typical behavior of your classical 'ghost'...

It's also reflective of my spirit in that I am not a quiter...not when it comes to people...

I never leave people...people leave me...I've never left anyone...

I leave jobs, but not people...I maintane relationships for as long as I can, or until I loose my cell phone with all numbers on them...

If I believe in God, Jesus...and all that he did...
Than how can I leave, abandon people??

I'm very strong on the inside...even though the photos I use to post may have given a different perception...but I posted those photos cause I was 'strong'...not weak...

And those photos are a phase that has long since past me...and I'm glad I went through it...

I learned a lot about myself, and others...

People cannot turn me off by ignoring me...the engine inside of me continues...



it's a engine only destiny and time can shut off...and I guess that would be my appointment with death...whenever that is...

In the mean time, I continue to write, for invisible souls out there, souls that find solice in their own way, in what I write...

Oh well...it's dark and quiet now...not sure what I'll do the rest of the night...

back soon...

 

Title: Sunday, the day of a million 'gods'...



Does God exist outside of mans own mind...yes...I believe he, it, does..

But for the most part...the only god most people know and seek is 'self'...outside of 'self'...god is 'dead' to most.

We basically interpit our own bodies, our own desires, needs, wants, cultural influences, styles and taste, as being 'god'...

Cause outside of those things, what do we know?
Outside of your own bodies senses, what have you, we felt?

I believe that would be nada...

It becomes apparent that there's a million 'gods' on Sunday or Sabbath day (if your adventist) just by examining man, his methods, and his ways...

First just within Christanity, there's thousands of churches...and within those churches, millions of different personalities, cultures, heritiges and styles.

To the Southern man, god is 'southern'...cause he is...

To the Racist man, god is 'racist'...cause he is...

To the Billionare banker, god is 'rich' and loves money...cause he does...

To the black man...god is 'black'...cause he is...

To the white man, god is 'white'...cause he is...

To the Asian man, god is 'asian'...cause he is...

To the Republican, god is 'republican...cause he is...

To the Democrat, god is 'democrat'...cause he is...

And on and on and on...

It all comes back to 'self'....and that's the only god most know...

Outside of self...god doesn't exist to most...

We call 'self' or 'self interest' 'god'...in order to justify our biases or interests.

It's more noble and sounds, feels, better to say

I'm following gods will

than it would be to say

I'm following my own will

But let's face it...most don't want to follow gods will, cause it might actually require them to do, feel or react in a way that upsets, disrupts 'self'...

It's easier to follow self, cause we can write the rules as we go, and just say, or lie to ourselves, and say 'it's god I'm following'...

And when we lie to ourselves long enough, we start to believe it...

Bottom line, most don't know god, most don't want to know god, most only want to know self...




(keep breaking down the particulars of 'god', and it's funny how that 'god' will end up resembling yourself, your interest, your biases, your likes, dislikes...even your heritage, hair and eye color...that 'god' that we all claim to follow, will end up more and more resembling the man/woman in the mirror)

 

Weekends at home...



For those of you who wonder about the sacrifices many over the road drivers make...
One of those is weekends at home...the back yard..particularly if your married, have kids, and a lot of friends...
There's nothing like your back yard kingdom...where the grill rules...and the smell or aroma of grilled meat is in the air...

I have a job now, that allows me to be home, off on the weekends...
And I love that...not that I have a bussling life at the moment...but the template is there, should and when things pick up...the weekends will have meaning again...



From k-12 and above...and other schooling and adventures...weekends meant something...a time to 'party'...let loose, hang out, rebel...have fun, go boating, hobbies, movies ect ect...

Often as a OTD, you instead will find yourself parked at Pilot truck stop or rest area or urban area, where your unfirmiluar with the terrian and as such stay locked inside of truck...

After a while you forget how to have fun, how to smile...

My spirit was dying out there...I had to make a change...risky...but had to...
Glad I did...but like I said many pages back...it took years to get myself here...to this point...and it will take many months, to get myself out of it...

But if you want something bad enough, and your intentions are noble...it will materialize for you...as it is for me...


The trucking lifestyle has really set me back...I have forgotten how to live...how to have fun, how to 'relax', without worrying about being called up by a dispatcher telling me I gotta leave out on Sunday...



Hey Joe, I have a load for you...it delivers 800 miles away...I need you to leave out at 11:00 am on Sunday to get there on time...

But Jerry, I just got in at 4:00pm on Saturday...I haven't even had time to relax yet...was planning a cook out today...

Dispatcher: Are you refusing the load?!

No....Ok...I'll get ready to leave here soon...

It's years of that kinda scheduale, stuff, that robs you of your spirit, and seperates you from others...

You stop planning, in fear of being called back to work while at your cabin...

It will change you...slowly but surely...it will change you...you will become obscessed with finding a place to park and sleeping...your life will be reduced to that...

And when you finally break free from that type of scheduale...it's hard at first...
Your hesitant to plan or do things...cause your so conditioned to not being able to...in essence, you have to teach yourself how to live again...and enjoy life...

To enjoy your weekends...full complete weekends, with no threat of a dispatcher calling you...

I think I got what I want...now I've just got to embrace it...and run with it...

The weekends are mine again...hip hip hurray...and just in time for summer...

Rental car, and Disney land...here we come...
Rental car and Epcoc center...here we come...
Rental car and beach side resort...here we come...

Slowly but surely, I will learn how to live again...