Trucking can be like a bad marriage...

I am still totally totally confused...like my head is spinning with confusing...

Have I missed something...I feel like your spinning me around...



cause I'm totally clueless...
Stop it please, your making me dizzy...
Some think I'm already dizzy enough as it is...I don't need to become more dizzy than I already am...

 

You may have to update your browser...or update for the latest 'flash player'...
That's usually what it is with me...

 

Here's how I really wanted to say goodnight...

Oh don't worry...it's totally clean...just artistic...I mean who do ya think I am after all...I do have dignity ya know...

http://underworldrealities.webs.com/apps/blog/

I just realize I'm alive only once...and old and spent in the end...

And when people want to hide you from others...it's as if they're wishing you dead or old...why?

It just seems unfair...but I must abide by the rules...
So please go to link...and dream weaver with me...(Gary Wright)...and realize I'm not such a bad person after all...just colorful and creative and full of love...

Good night ya'll...

 

For one...lost cell phone again..



or left it at 'stop'...luckily I have pre-paid, so their not that expensive...but still...

Then, vehicle I was driving around in must have dirty a/c filter...cause I started sneezing like mad...



So I lost, left phone, then allergies kick in...I'm running a bit behind, can't get ahold of supervisor...cause nextal garbage doesn't work right either...

It was like that Sopranos' episode, where they try getting rid of the Russian dude in the forest, the Russian dude escapes, they try calling their boss, and their cell phones starts the whole echo things...

We're all competing for perminant positions here, and all this occurs today...

So I get back to base, nose running, wasn't able to call, agitated and hyped up...now they probably think I'm doing cocaine...



They, my supervisor and the other managers are probably like...

'Oh we can't hire this guy perminatly now, look, their eyes are red, nose runny, and their sweating...must be using cocaine...' D'oh...

No, I'am not using cocaine...my allergies were simply acting up do to dirty a/c filter...I didn't call, cause I left phone...

Had you not called when I was on the



Then maybe I wouldn't of lost phone, heck as far as I know, It could of got flushed down the toilet...
Why must people always call you during that time?
Do they sense it or something?

Had dude just waited a few more minutes, I would of been done...and phone would of stayed in pocket...

Like I said...just not a good day...
But at least now I can relax for a few hours..hopefully, we'll see...

 

Well, this, and this...just depends, and switches off...



Point being...I'm no longer over the road...
And moments ago, as I was scanning the over the road adds...
Just none really appealed to me anymore...

Sometimes, I run into over the road drivers, during my regular routes...
And nothing has changed...all seemed burned out and tired...or old and ragedy...

You never see hot young sexy guys/gals driving big rigs anymore...I wonder why?

Instead you see people who look like they wished they had gotten out of it 20 years ago...and who are just hanging on until retirement...

Older, grouchy males who drive around listening to Neil Bortz all day..
And who have learned to conviently blame all their problems, short comings in life on..
1. Liberals
2. Gay people
3 minorities
4. women
5. Obama...

Or you have to older urban types, who are constantly wired to their ear peace cell phone...and maybe some 'Leroy Brown' types still exist...not sure...(reference the song)

Comradity, is another thing you get from working a 'home every day type job'...

You actually get to know your co-workers, each others stengths, weaknesses, you learn to work as a team...

You don't get that over the road...where you're lucky to run into a co-driver once every 6 months...if that...many drivers you will only meet once...and never again...expecially in the larger fleets like Swift or Werner or Knight...

I'm not going to get rich doing what I'm doing now...not even...but the schedual alone is worth a lot to me...

And it gets you back into shape...which opens up other similuar opportunities...

Anyways...whatever makes you happy and toots your horn...

 

Ahh, the good o'l days of flying...



Yes, the good o'l days...at least to me...
When people actually walked out on the tarmac and boarded directly into the aircraft...
When the world was still 'big', a 'mystery'...

When the clouds, and beyond, seemed like other worlds waiting to be explored...

Those days seem to be gone...
Now we seem to live in a over regulated controlled enviornment..from cradle to grave...

Anyways...sticking to tradition...I always say 'Happy Saturday'...on the weekends...

Like clock work...i try to be here and consistant when possible...

I miss the 'golden era' of America...even though I wasn't even alive yet..but relive it through movies, peoples accounts and photos...



Life just seemed to make more sense back then...
There was like order, and roles...I guess...

Your role in life was more 'defined'...
And it was much much easier to achieve your goals, cause things were
still simple...not so complex...

 

More death....
But you know what, I'm begining to think that death is beautiful...
Those who die have nothing more to worry about...no bills, no self esteem issues, no social caste issues, no germs, illnesses...they're just gone...so why be sad?



It's the after math they leave behind that's often troubling..
Dealing with emotions...
Emotions can make or break you...
That's why Mr Spock, from Star Trek, was so evolved...the Vulcans knew how destructive, and sometimes useless, emotions could be...



Yes, the Vulcans were onto something...leave all emotions behind..
Makes sense at times...
Gene Roddenberry...was way ahead of his time, with this show, and his themes...many creative directors and producers were back then...a special breed indeed...

Cause right now, I get more comfort from his show, the character of Spock...than I do scripture...

The bible is full of promises that never seem to happen, at least for me...
Where as the character of Spock simply says, no emotion, and logic...which helps me more now, in the real time...

(That's probably not a fair analyst)...after all the bible offers salvation...and Star Trek was a fictional story based on human themes...

And I guess some would say so was the bible...

Look, I know God is real...but just seems so absent at times...
It's like God never says he 'loves you'...instead we tell ourselves that 'God loves us'...

But God never verbally says it himself...
But I still believe...and always will...but don't always understand Gods ways or methods...

I mean who can?

Humans created in Gods image?
So what...is god prejudice, and bias, and racist, like man?

Sometimes it just doesn't make sense at all...

Continued on next post...

 

What if God had just wiped out Adam and Eve, and started over again...right there on the spot?
I mean two deaths, vs trillions...

2/1,000,000,000,000,000's

Where's the logic or balance in that?

Allow Adam and Eve to live, so that billions, trillions of subsequent souls should die, be lost, suffer and burn in a hot spot?

All for what?

To prove what point? and to whom?

Spare Adam and Eve...but destroy countless trillions who follow??

Again...for what? For love?
How is destroying trillions of souls love?

What, to prove that Lucifer is wrong?
Is there not other ways to prove the devil is wrong than allowing trillions of souls to be destroyed?



Why would a god of such power and magnificiants even care about mortal flesh 'worshiping' it...

Sometimes it seems so so...human...

And I'd like to believe god is way above humans, in behavior mood and style...

I mean am I missing something?

I'm sure I am...I admit I'm flawed...none the less I work with that which I have...just like a tadpole, or a duck or owl...you work with what you have...
God knows I'm an honest sincere soul...
If he's already determined to destroy me, there's nothing I can do about it anyways...

But if he, it, is full of love, and understands his 'kids' anguish...than just maybe he'll understand...

Who knows...

http://underworldrealities.webs.com/aboutme.htm

 

[ame]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QkBUx6Zn6mo&feature=related[/ame]

...........................................................................................

Don't you worry bout a thing...

I understand that 'edge'...
That sense of 'loyalty'...family...

The whole West Coast thing...Los Angeles in particular...
Even Yakima, WA, and all parts in between...

Some of us are rejects for life, whether tattooed up or not...feel me...

Polo...I miss ya...Clearfield, Utah...Job Corps...





Stay young forever btch...

Don't ever die...keep that spirit alive...

But if I do die, go...I'd rather do it back home...

West Coast style...instead of this southeast southern sht...
Backwood colonial ngros...

I prefer my West Coast vatos instead...



I don't know...we'll see...

All this will probably be gone tomorrow...
just having a grieving moment...