Two accidents in two months.. what now?

Stop blaming everything under the sun... monotone voice, pickup and delivery schedules, needy family members, associates, etc etc etc. You and you alone turned on that ignition. You and you alone kept pushing too hard until your brain faltered. Most importantly you are not a good driver if one wreck alone didn't teach you anything.
Everyone thinks they can do this. Reality is a bit more exclusionary than that.

 

You should get a class B local driving job and get some home time and a check. And more importantly, driving experience. You will work harder, but that’s life for you for now

 

Frankly you are still 'wet behind the ears' appear to think you are invincible.

Running flat out against your 70 for a whole year is a treadmill most cannot maintain.

True that the majority trucking companies are one to ten units big and also most likely to not survive.

Remember the third time won't go well and that's why most insurance companies limit to 2 accidents, only one 'at fault', back three years. You are not insurable at a lot of places and your demeanor may be problematic with the companies that might give you a chance.

Just about any 'salty' truck owner's alarm bell will start up while listening to your explanations as given above.

Seriously reconsider your choice of occupations.

 

The difference between a good driver and a bad driver is sound judgement. We have to make hundreds of calls every week that make the difference between getting the load where it needs to be on time without a ticket or an accident or stuck in a ditch. So much of what you wrote is just plain wrong.

"...the opportunity to be an owner was only the next logical step." Really? with less than a year of experience? That seemed like a good idea to you?

"...maxing out both clocks each week." and "I managed our filings, accounting, and relationships." So, driving 70 hrs a week then booking loads, invoicing, paying bills and preparing filings explains why you couldn't stay awake.

"Growing our business, we added a second truck and two drivers March 1st. Both were gone within a few weeks, meaning the two of us had to split up." Hiring replacements never crossed your mind?

You have consistently used poor judgement. You're lucky you haven't killed anyone - YET! You are a danger to the motoring public. I wouldn't trust you to drive a Big Wheel. Amazon is probably hiring warehouse workers in your area. You should look into that or one of the other millions of other unfilled jobs, just not a safety-sensitive one.

 

Full stop Driver

Learn to pull over when you’re tired.
Better yet park and go to bed like nature intended.
You can’t make money if you’re dead.

You really should have learned the first close call you had. I know it happened.
90% chance you “blinked” for a really long time we’ll before your accident occurred.

that nodding off should have taught you the lesson you still didn’t learn after totaling a truck.

 

We share a few things in common Western Express I was there many moons ago. You are going through what I did many moons ago. I too was a roadrunner. We shared some bad habits one in particular no balance when it came to planning to run successful and not have these type of life threatening events. It did not take me long to get back up & running again I have great friends. My insurance was higher. I had a good friend who sold me one of his trucks. I want us to share this together also you learn balance in your life. This to will pass & you will tell your story to your daughter of how you got back up. I did it & many others have also be encouraged. I do hope all goes well for you

 

Good example of someone who should have lost their cdl the first time around.

Nothng more dangerous than a reckless person who thinks they are invincible.

 

Glad to hear your safe and alive. I got into many dings and small accidents with Swift back in 2006/2007. Then a rollover occurred due to myself not getting enough rest and that ended that job. Fired, blacklisted thanks to accident being on record, and back into low pay security and living with parents.

I went three long years trying to hold it together. Spent 6 months working, then six months in a hospital after the pressure of a low paying job and failing at college courses trying to find a new career pushed me into a near successful attempt at offing myself. Then after getting out of there, got my old security job back and also found a part time gig driving containers with a seedy outfit that at least got me some post accident experience.


By 2010, I had been working security again for 2 years and got that 6 months of container trucking experience under my belt(company went under after my six months were up, June of 2008 to Jan 2009). At the three year mark, I was ready to accept defeat and focus on a welding certificate at the local college(word of advice, work on vocational certificates instead of gunning for the academic path after what may be a career ender. Working with the hands keeps you occupied better than equations and theories). Got two classes out of the way before being called back by Western Express for a job.


11 years later, driving milk tankers and complaining about the usual issues(pay not going up, having to relocate to an expensive urban area for better work., etc). But if there's anything that keeps me from repeating a rollover like the one I had, it's the thought of returning to that ultra dark hole that could've easily had me end up either dead, or committed/imprisoned for quite some time. I start feeling the least bit tired, I park it and go right to sleep. Dispatch whines about a late load, I let them whine. Easier to find another job as long as you didn't get canned over an accident.

Might take you awhile to find your footing in the industry again. But be sure to learn from your mistakes and focus on the dark times you don't want to return to. Many drivers told me to either "change careers or fast food until I croak". But I more or less gave the detractors the finger and eventually found my way back.

On the subject of career changes, even those could turn into disasters of their own caliber(plenty of people working minimum wage due to trying and failing at several career paths in their life. It's one thing to accrue student debt and have a degree. Plenty more that accrued debt and have Jack to show for it.). That's why you find something simple to do temporarily to pay bills and also keep putting in apps at other trucking outfits ad nauseam. Some will relent, some will say no. But just keep firing away regardless.

Anything to one day proclaim; "Despite the critics, I'M STILL HERE!"

 

And stop saying it's only a simple fine, or blaming other's when it's you behind the wheel and ultimately everything you do is a big deal.....

 

Yes your are still here. Thank you Lord